I set up an open call on Facebook, to fish for members of Wilfrid Laurier University’s Brantford campus community who were interested in telling me about the items they’d kept to remember their loved ones.

I received an email my first point of contact was a woman named Jenn McDougall, who explained that she had seen my event on Facebook because she is Mia’s cousin, and wanted to tell me the story of the things she keeps.

“I thought I would share about the piece that resonates with me the most,” McDougall explained in the email.

“When I was 10, I had 2 best friends. Shannon collected notebooks, I collected interesting pencils and our friend Jessica collected erasers. When Jessica died, we were told that her parents were coming to clear out her desk. The class got surprisingly upset by this last lost of connection to her so Shannon and I went on a mission. While Shannon distracted the teachers at break, I snuck into the class and stole her case of erasers. When we went outside, we handed out an eraser to everyone in our class. I kept the remainder and continued the collection for her and have now passed it onto my oldest boy, Jacob. Although, I keep the one I designated as mine in my hope chest. It's a pink aligator. [sic].”

Slowly, more responses began rolling in and students reached out, explaining that they were interested in talking to me. When I attempted to arrange interviews, many backed out.

Bereaved Families of Ontario’s South Central Region chapter’s website explains, “Grief is: a continuing development, involving many changes over time. It will come and go and appear different at times Grief is: a natural expectable reaction. In fact, the absence of it (when a less is experienced) in abnormal in most cases.”

When I was at a concert with a good friend this March, she reached into her pocket and pulled out a Duck Dynasty themed lighter. I laughed, knowing my friend, I assumed that the lighter must have been purchased as some kind of ironic statement.

“It was my uncle’s,” she explained.

The Duck Dynasty lighter was the thing he’d left behind for her, and she’d been carrying it in jean jacket ever since.

Through creating The Things We Keep, I learned that sometimes, the familiar items that we can ascribe as belonging to the people in our life (like a hat, sweater or bracelet), are actually treasured  pieces that are filled with stories of loss, coping and healing.